5 Ways to Maintain Lifelong Friendships


Don’t take your friend for granted. 

Don’t just assume that your friend will be there for you when you need them if you don't regularly keep in contact. Cherish your friendships and be there for your friends during the ups and the downs.

If your friend is going through a tough time and is irritable or grumpy, it's important that you're there to talk to them instead of avoiding them until they feel better.

When you see your friend regularly, you can easily fall into a routine and not acknowledge how much you care for them.

Don't talk badly about your friend to other people. 

If you are a genuine friend, you won't talk badly about your friend and you won't share their private information with other people. Stick up for your friend when other people are talking poorly about them. Don't spread rumors and keep personal things to yourself.[13]

For instance, if someone is speaking badly about your friend you can say something like, "I don't agree with you at all. Sally is a great person and she wouldn't do anything to hurt someone intentionally."

Apologize when you make a mistake. 

Be willing to reach out to your friend and apologize for your behavior. Try to explain your reasoning, even it makes you feel vulnerable. Reach out and contact them, rather than waiting for them to reach out to you.[15]

You can say something like, “Hey, I’m really sorry I dropped the ball on making reservations. I was so overwhelmed with work recently that it totally slipped my mind.”

Limit your expectations and don’t make assumptions. 

Everyone makes mistakes and it’s important to manage your expectations so that you don’t feel let down when your friend makes a mistake. If your friend lets you down, have an honest conversation with them rather than berating them or being angry at them.[17]

For instance, if your friend forgot your birthday, you could say something like, “I expected a call from you for my birthday. I’m not mad, but it did bum me out.”


Top Five Regrets- By Bronnie Ware

For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.
People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learned never to underestimate someone's capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.
When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me
This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have had not honored even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. It is very important to try and honor at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.


2. I wish I didn't work so hard
This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence. By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.


3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings
Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.
We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.


4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends
Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying. It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.


5. I wish that I had let myself be happier
This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.
When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.



放工回家时在电梯前的同事问我为什么看起来很累,我回答:昨天才从香港回来然后今天又要工作所以很累. 可是现在照照镜子,看起来不是单纯travel的累!也许需要静下来休息一下...




Mayday五月天諾亞方舟演唱會【倔強】北京鳥巢 20萬人肉彩虹

我就是我自己的神 在我活的地方